Posted in Ketogenic, Weight Loss

Did You Miss Me?

Dear Diary,

Did you miss me? I know it’s been a while and I know what you’re thinking: “You’ve failed your diet again. You are ashamed and that’s why you haven’t written.” Normally, you would be right. But not today. Well, not exactly. So let me give you an update.

Let’s start with the bad news first, I guess. The truth is, I have cheated on my diet. And I mean, I’ve cheated a lot. I took a trip to Paris at the end of September for about a week and ate my heart out with pastries and baguettes and pastries, and chaussons aux pommes (which is a type of pastry…). I cannot say that I regret any part of that decision. But I have not been able to get back on track with Keto since then. Sugar addiction is a real thing!

The good news is that before I left for Paris, I hit two HUGE milestones! First, I officially lost a total of 40 pounds!!! Woot woot! As a visual reminder of what that looks like, here is 40 pounds of bacon (or, at least, what the internet says is 40 pounds of bacon…)!Bacon

Secondly, I finally weighed-in at under 200 pounds! I FOUND ONE-DERLAND! *cue Taylor Swift song “Wonderland”* So, my weight pre-Paris was 197. As part of this good news, I have been able to maintain that weight up until now. I was so worried I would be about 10 pounds heavier when we came back from France.

So, that’s where I’m at. 40 pounds lost, under 200 pounds, and stuck in a rut. But, I am starting to climb out of it and get back into the keto diet and intermittent fasting. I still have about 40 pounds to lose to hit my ideal goal weight and with the holidays right around the corner, I’m a bit anxious. Last year, when I was doing keto, the holidays came and I completely lost all of my progress and by February had gained back all the weight.

Maybe I can come up with a good plan for this season so that won’t happen again.


Posted in diet, Health, Ketogenic, Running, Weight Loss

I’m Baaaaaack!

On August 3rd, I woke up at 5:00am, drove thirty minutes north, took a few deep breaths, and walked into my first year of teaching middle school. I may have been more nervous than some of my students on that first day, thinking “am I really qualified to do this?”, “what am I even doing?” and the ever ambivalous question “what is differentiated instruction?”

Life has been a whirlwind ever since that first day, and while I never completely forgot about my fitness goals, they have not been at the forefront of my mind. Lesson plans, assessments, parent contact, student success, administrative duties, and all the other miscellaneous responsibilities of being a teacher took over. Well, it has been just over three weeks since the first day and I am ready to get back in the saddle.

It’s not that I have fallen off the wagon, per se, but I have not been as careful as I should be with my diet, nor have I been doing any sort of exercise (besides the two flights of stairs I walk up every morning and ambulating up and down the hallways). Despite the numerous cheat meals (or cheat DAYS), and my more sedentary state, I am thrilled to announce that I have lost another 10 pounds. That makes for a total loss of 20 POUNDS, people!!!

So, thanks in most part to my husband’s encouragement, I’m back at it! It never seems like a good time to get back at it. I’m still overwhelmed with school responsibilities, stressed, and tired. But that’s life. It’s always going to be that way. I’ve just got to bite the bullet and hit the treadmill. So that’s what I did, today.

I ran my fastest mile today (which is still not very fast, but hey, it’s progress). I’m still preparing for a 5k on September 30th, which is very scary and motivating. I also started the 200 sit-up program that my husband reccommended and am doing that on the days that I don’t run.

So, despite all of my set backs recently, I am very satisfied with my results and ready to make more progress in the coming weeks.

Posted in diet, Health, July 2017, Running, Weight Loss

Days 8 & 9: Making Progress

(To my readers: (Wow! It feels weird to say that!) I think from now on, I will continue to update this segment two days at a time, so as not to overwhelm with too many posts or be rather boring. 🙂 )

Day 8 was on Monday. I felt just ok about my run-not the best and not the worst. I’m totally scrapping the C25K plan for now and setting my own goals, instead. I feel like my own goals are slightly more realistic and manageable right now, and more than anything, I don’t want to become discouraged by not meeting goals.

I had a rest day on Tuesday. Sometimes I’m just not feelin’ it, I tell ya, and my hip was not feelin’ it on Tuesday. I don’t know what else to do about that-I’m taking fish oil and collagen supplements. I think the only thing that will help is seeing a chiropractor for an adjustment.

My body was feeling better tonight and ready to hit the gym, and I had a pretty successful run. I could really tell that progress is being made tonight. I ran at a faster pace at the beginning and then did intervals of fast running and walking for a total of twenty minutes plus a five minute warm up and cool down. I think my next run, I will try to focus on endurance, not speed, because I feel like that is my weaker weakness.

Onward and upward (and hopefully downward on the scale. 😉 )!

Posted in Body Positivity, diet, July 2017, Weight Loss

Will I Always be the Fat Kid?

All my life I’ve been the fat kid.

It didn’t help that I lived in France for a while where I towered above all of my classmates in elementary school. Nobody was shy about talking about my weight, not even the grown-ups. I remember one kid teasing me and asking me “How much do you way? 50 kilos???!?!” And I said “No….” (because I actually weighed more than that).

The doctor I went to in France wanted to put me on a diet. I was eleven. I remember him talking to me about the things I should and shouldn’t eat and all I could think was that I don’t make the meals in the house…I just eat whatever is set in front of me and whatever my family is eating.

In high school, I decided I’d had enough and started running every day and basically starving myself. I would skip breakfast, have an apple for lunch, have a small portion of whatever meal was prepared for dinner, and I avoided sweets. Towards the end of that school year, people started noticing changes in my body. But I wasn’t skinny enough to be called thin, even though I had lost a good amount of weight. So, still, I was the fat kid.

So I wonder…when/if I make it to my goal weight, will the doctors still classify me  as “obese” according to the BMI chart? Will people still call me “big-boned” or “curvy”? And most importantly, when I look in the mirror will I be able to see myself as I truly am? Or will I always be the fat kid?

Posted in Health, July 2017, Running, Weight Loss

Days 6 & 7; The Good, The Bad and The Ugly Cry

I didn’t write about my run yesterday because it was so bad and I was ashamed. I felt like a failure, poopy nugget, incapable of succeeding at anything and too discouraged to admit my shortcomings right then.

My run started out ok..I ran 8 minutes without stopping and then walked for about five, following the week 5 day 2. When I set out to run the second set of 8 min. I immediately felt burned out and couldn’t do it!

I had also been feeling pretty emotional all day, and there is just something about not being in a very good mindset that makes it so much harder to run. During the last 8 minutes of my walk/run, when I was struggling to find every last bit of energy in my body, I flashed back to when I was in high school and would go running almost every weekday with my dad.

We would agree on it the night before: “I’m going to the gym tomorrow, wanna come?” he’d ask. “Yeah! Just wake me up when it’s time to get ready”, I’d reply. And the next morning, he would come get me at 5:00 or so, I’d stagger into my workout clothes, and slowly wake up in the passenger seat on the way to the gym. We were sometimes the very first people there, walking in as soon as the doors opened and heading straight to “our” treadmills. And then we would run, side by side. We never really talked while we ran (we were too busy huffing and puffing) but it was nice to know we were there for each other.

And I missed that…so badly…and between that thought and all the negative thoughts about how poorly I was doing and how much I was failing, I began to sob on the treadmill. I mean, I was ugly crying. I left feeling sad and defeated.

Today, as I reflected on my run yesterday, I reminded myself that every day I go to the gym is something to be proud of. I didn’t know if I’d have time to go today, after working 8 hours, meeting a friend for coffee, having dinner when I got home, waiting for it to settle, etc…plus knowing I have an early morning tomorrow, as well.

I was really encouraged, though by my friend, who runs a lot and admitted to me her own mental blocks when it comes to running and shared a bit of her perspective with me. I felt so refreshed and motivated by our conversation, that I just had to go running tonight no matter what.

And I’m glad I did. I ran a mile without stopping! Granted, it was a really slow pace, but for me, it was an accomplishment. I pushed myself, having set a goal of running for ten minutes without stopping, I ended up running 12:30-something because I was so close to completing a mile that I couldn’t just stop at 10 minutes! So I’ve past my mental block-I know I can run a mile, at least without stopping, and am just gonna keep on working my way up to 1.25, 1.5, 1.75, 2…

Posted in Health, June 2017, Weight Loss

Oops…I fasted.

Last night I had a cheat meal–Chinese–and it was so delicious. I may have overdone it slightly and jokingly groaned at the end of the meal “I’m not going to eat ANYTHING tomorrow”. Though I was only joking, there are people who love to incorporate intermittent fasting into their way of eating. I’ve never really tried it myself, yet, though because I’ve always loved food too much. I can’t remember a day in my life that my plans haven’t revolved around food. I enjoy cooking and I enjoy eating yummy food, so it makes sense that those three meals a day would be at the forefront of my mind most days and particularly on dull days.

But, coincidentally, today, I had a very long day at work and ended up working from 6:30 am to 6:00 pm without having any time to eat. I was too busy to even think about taking a break or eating food! So, basically, I unintentionally fast intermittently. The funniest thing is, I didn’t really miss the food. I’ve heard that about being keto–it keeps you full and satisfied. It was actually really easy for me to not eat today.

Mind over matter, as they say. I’m realizing that I don’t actually need to eat as much as I think I do. I eat a lot because I feel sad. I eat because people around me are eating. I eat because I’m bored. But I don’t actually need to eat as much as I want to eat.

So maybe I’ll try this intermittent fasting thing more often and on purpose next time.

Posted in June 2017

Non-Scale Victories

The scale. It is a wonderful tool but such an intimidating one at the same time. Before my Keto journey, I was afraid of the scale. I would force myself to step on it, occasionally, and grit my teeth as the reality of the numbers hit me.

Now, I weigh myself every day. Not because I weigh so much less and the numbers aren’t discouraging sometimes. I’m not allowing myself to become discouraged. Instead of feeling defeated, I have realized that weight fluctuates and that numbers can be significant but don’t represent all there is to tell in my weight loss journey.

Because, I don’t just want to weigh a certain amount. Being skinny is not equal to being fit. There are things I want to DO, ways that I want to feel that my body won’t allow in its present state.

So these are the important factors, making me feel successful in this way of eating.  These Non-Scale Victories (NSV). Feeling better, having more energy, running a mile without stopping-those are the motivating factors, now, for me. Yes, the numbers still motivate me. They remind me that I’m not where I need to be yet. They show me how fickle weight can be.

At the end of the day, the numbers don’t define me or even accurately reflect the hard work I’ve been doing. They’re just a prompt, a reprimand sometimes, a motivation.


Posted in June 2017

10 Pounds Down

I started the Keto diet on May 29th, weighing in at 230 pounds with a short term goal of 220 in mind. I hit that goal on Friday, June 23rd, less than one month into my diet and with plenty of cheat days in between. scale-403585_1920

This amazes me considering that, in the fall, when I was dieting, I made less progress in a longer period of time and I felt like I was killing myself for every ounce of fat lost. Since June of last year, I have lost 20 pounds… 20!! Let that sink in! That’s the size of a toddler!

I’m 220 pounds now. It’s weird seeing that number and being happy about it. I shouldn’t be happy about a number that is still so big. But it’s better than before. 220 is my “after” right now, and I can’t wait for that number to be my “before”.

StockSnap_MGWWJDK49DSo, yeah, I’m liking this whole Keto thing. I’m eating high fat, moderate protein, and very low carb (like, under 20g of net carbs per day) and it seems to be working! I eat a lot of eggs, cheese, meat and green leafy veggies and I don’t feel like I’m starving myself. I actually feel full and some days struggle to meet my caloric intake requirements for the day.

So encouraged by my progress so far and looking forward to taking my 1 month photos.